In Spite of Your Circumstances…

Encouragement to be happy on Near a River.

Learn to be happy right now before you run out of time.

Last winter as we were camping, the camper next door came over and gave us some homemade soup for dinner. Then we sat and talked a while. We realized we are two peas in a pod. We both have had hard lives, experienced abuse, and have struggled in our relationships with our Mothers. Yet both of us are very happy people.

Terri, our neighbor, told me her Mother had died before she learning to be happy.  And that she herself had learned from her Mother’s example:  In spite of your circumstances, learn to be happy now before it is too late. Talking about this subject, we concluded these three behaviors enable a person to feel content and happy.

FIRST, HAVE HIGH HOPES WITHOUT HIGH EXPECTATIONS.

Having hope means to work toward a positive outcome. Although you are putting effort into a positive outcome, do not expect an initial positive outcome.

Both our neighbor and I I have always worked toward positive outcomes in every situation. But we are not disappointed when the initial outcome is less than our  hopes.

Some of my earliest memories are  grandmother teaching  me Bible verses. She taught me even before I started first grade Job 6:20, “For all their expectations, they are doomed to disappointment”. Instead of being disappointed when the initial outcome is not what you had hoped for, strive and persist to change that outcome.

Having high hopes without high expectations reduces the negativity of disappointments…It also encourages you to keep working toward your goal. And having a focus toward moving ahead causes you to feel motivation, which leads to happy feelings…

SECOND, FORGIVE THOSE WHO HAVE HARMED YOU.

I read the other day that the first to apologize is the bravest, the first to forgive is the strongest, and the first to forget is the happiest. Forgiveness means letting go letting go of any negative feelings. Forgiveness means letting go of any desire to seek revenge . If you cannot forgive for the benefit of the person who harmed you, forgive for your own benefit.

When I am trying to forgive someone, I consider what I like about them. Then I try to consider the reasons he is a valuable and lovable person. I also try to put myself in that person’s shoes, even though I probably would not have done what he or she did. I put myself in that person’s shoes to enable me to feel empathetic toward his or her desire to be forgiven.

When I forgive someone, I feel as though a great big storm cloud has just blown away and the sky above me is blue and sunny. Forgiving others creates peace in your life, and peace is essential to happiness. Having peace in your life leads to feelings of happiness.

THIRD, FOCUS ON WHAT IS GOOD IN YOUR LIFE.

One Bible verse comes to mind, Philippians 4:8:  “Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.”

If something in your past haunts you and makes you feel depressed, journal about that event. Then either burn or shred that piece of paper. And forgive (let go of your negative feelings toward)  the people who hurt you. Then focus on what is good in your life.

Writing about what happened helps you to process the event, then shredding or burning it  symbolically puts it behind you. Focusing on what is good in your life creates positive feelings—happy feelings.

***

Be happy no matter what the current circumstances in your life are. Don’t wait for your life to get better to be happy, because life will always be complicated. Learn to be happy right now before you run out of time.

 

Let the encouraging words in these bobbiejrae posts help you

soar like an eagle above life’s storms.

 

Are you sad?

I love you with all of my me!

You are a very powerful person!

Go ahead and do “the impossible”!

 

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View Comments (1)

  • Once again B J you have addressed a very important need with great advice on how to deal with difficult people and difficult situations. Application to each of the points which you have made will make our lives much more fulfiling!

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