We all know what bullhead-itis is, even though it’s a word I coined myself last week!
Recently we moved to a new home in a different town for medical reasons. Our older new neighbor across the street was very helpful and friendly at first. He helped us move boxes from our garage to our downstairs, gave us phone numbers for service people we might use, and even invited us to a barbecue.
Initially, I attributed his flirting to the fact that I was having a terrible problem in my right foot, Complex Regional Pain Syndrome. and ignored it. I honestly believed he was trying to make me feel better about myself because of the depression CRPS causes. But last Thursday after dinner, as I walked our two dogs down our street, he was returning home and stopped to chat.
As he flipped though the cash in his wallet for something he wanted to give me, I told him, “You don’t owe me any money. I haven’t done anything for you!”
“Just give me a minute to find it. It’s very important!” he replied in a serious tone.
Seconds later, he handed me a small piece of paper, on which he had written an email address in block style letters (REALP–@AOL.COM) and said, “This is my private email address. I’ve admired you since the first time I saw you.”
With a gleam in his eye, he continued,
“My wife doesn’t even know about this one,
so it gives us the ability to communicate about anything.
Is your email address private?”
Ray knows I am very happily married, and this offended me greatly. I wrote to the first email address he’d given me and told him as respectfully as possible about my displeasure with his lack of respect for me and my marriage.
His bullhead-itis reply made me wish we’d bought a different home somewhere else.
The next day, as I retrieved our mail from the box, he stopped again to chat.
“Hey, Baby, want to go out tonight?” he asked me with that familiar gleam in his eyes.
As I walked back into our house, I hummed Lori Morgan’s familiar tune to myself…
What part of ‘No’ don’t you understand?
To put it plain and simple
I’m not into one night stands.
I’d be glad to explain,
if it’s too hard to comprehend.
What part of ‘No’ don’t you understand?
Our neighbor hadn’t gotten the message. I believe his skull is too thick to comprehend it, and that he suffers from a condition I coined last week, bullhead-itis. It is much worse than the CRPS, heart disease, cancer, or any other known health issue. Although it has existed since creatures walked in our universe and others may have defined it before me, I wrote my own description.
A person with this issue is like a bull. He thinks with an unneutered part of his body that has no brain cells, obviously not the right cells to use to process thoughts. His skull is very thick, has (invisible) horns that injure anyone in his path with thoughts contrary to his own. When crossed, he sees red and responds as Ray did above with inaccurate assumptions about the other person. Other people afflicted with this problem in my past have tried to destroy anyone and anything that didn’t agree with them, so I now walk down my street with the voice recorder in my cell phone turned on.
Ray isn’t the only person in the US or in the world with this affliction. People who refuse to listen to viewpoints other than their own, those who destroy other people or public property when angry, and some US politicians fall into this category.
What can we do about them?
Sometimes speaking with them won’t change their behavior.
However, we can:
- Set clear limits for behaviors as well as verbal and physical injury to others. (If current laws don’t protect you, encourage your legislator to introduce new ones!)
- Protect ourselves any way we can. (This includes avoiding them socially and voting some people out of office!)
- Thinking our own thoughts and not letting those bullheads change our opinions. (Should we even venture near protesters, especially those who don’t wear masks and contribute to the spread of coronavirus? Perhaps we shouldn’t interact with media by watching TV or online news produced by those who insult us with inaccurate reporting.)
***
I am not certain where bullhead-itis originated,
but it sure seems worse than coronavirus, doesn’t it?
Like the spread of coronavirus, those of us who don’t have it do have some control over how much it affects us. For the virus, we can wear masks in public and take the usual precautions to prevent catching it. We can also take the precautions above to protect ourselves from bullhead-itis and show others through our speech and actions that some people in our country have rational opinions.
By the way, males or females can be afflicted with this condition, and there is no age limit to those it affects.
The running of the bulls is a very dangerous sport, and
this state of mind is ‘very much a shame’ for our country’s future!
Let’s get bullhead-itis under control!
Let the encouraging words in these bobbiejrae posts help you
soar like an eagle above life’s storms.
Yes, you can cope with these dysfunctional people,
Communicate effectively in ‘sticky’ moments,
and survive no matter what happens!
Never forget you are special!
Enjoy BJ’s encouraging words
on bobbiejrae.com.
BJ’s encouraging books are available
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and Barnesandnoble.com.
Buy BJ’s books
for people
you care about today!
