bobbiejrae in Articles On BobbieJRae.com (Are the Best!)Holidays that Heal...

Let Go of a Monster

Give yourself the best gift possible: Let go of the monster in your life!

Does Christmas make your home more miserable than it usually is?

If you are trapped in a negative and emotionally harmful relationship, the holidays just amplify the unhappiness in your home.

Years ago, I was where you are now. My now ex-husband was narcissistic and abusive and mean and… Well, he was simply a monster.

When I let go of him, the rest of my life began. Yes, I struggled financially for a few years, but with hard work, I survived.

Today I have a good life with a kind, loving man who accepts me for who I am, flaws and all.

You can let go of your monster, too.

First, summon your courage and your strength. Start by listing your good characteristics, your strengths, and your passions. Then tell yourself you are a good person. Tell yourself that you do not deserve to live with an abusive partner.
Second, make your escape plan. Stash any money you can anywhere he will not find it. In your jeans pockets in your closet, inside the tips of your shoes, at a friend’s home , or anywhere else he might not look. Find out where the domestic violence shelter nearest you is or a friend you might be able to stay with. Remember that the domestic violence shelters are used to dealing with angry men who want their mates back, so perhaps it is a good idea to stay at a shelter.
Third, pack your things and leave when he is not home. Take important items, such as birth certificates, marriage certificates, social security cards, copies of the past few years’ tax returns, and your money. Stay with a friend or at a shelter for domestic violence, get a restraining order, and file for divorce if you are married to your monster.
Fourth, do not return to him—no matter how he begs you. When he begs you to return to him, remind yourself that you are a valuable person and worthy of true love. What he offers is abuse, not true love.
My monster was so bad that I needed to fly across the country to escape his fury. If you need to do that, ask for the case worker at your local shelter to send you to another state.

Clean the blood off of your feet from walking on eggshells for too long, give your feet a chance to heal, and start planning your future.

YOU DESERVE A HAPPY LIFE!

You will enjoy the holidays and the rest of your life much more after you let go of your monster! If you need any support, you can email me at bobbiejrae@gmail.com. I will be here for you and do anything I can to help you.