{"id":5759,"date":"2017-12-20T20:01:22","date_gmt":"2017-12-21T01:01:22","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.nearariver.com\/?p=5759"},"modified":"2026-09-10T11:23:08","modified_gmt":"2026-09-10T15:23:08","slug":"fourth-step-near-river-bj-rae-eagle-encouraging-words","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/bobbiejrae.com\/nearariver\/fourth-step-near-river-bj-rae-eagle-encouraging-words\/","title":{"rendered":"Step Four:  Mend ANY Relationship"},"content":{"rendered":"<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><em><span style=\"font-size: 10pt;\">What is the fourth step to mend ANY relationship?<\/span><\/em><\/p>\n<p>In the first three posts in this series, you read the first three steps to mending ANY relationship.\u00a0 First, you must commit to loving the person.\u00a0 Second, you must give up your need to be right in the other person\u2019s eyes.\u00a0 Third, you must not try to control the other person but set healthy boundaries instead.<\/p>\n<p>What is the fourth step? Take complete responsibility for how you feel. Stop blaming the other person for your anger and other negative feelings.<\/p>\n<p>Blaming someone else for your anger disempowers you because you lose control of your feelings when you do this. \u00a0If you want to feel empowered, simply take complete responsibility for your feelings and how you respond when someone does something that annoys or angers you. When you take responsibility for your own feelings instead of blaming someone else, you empower yourself because you remain in control of your behavior.<\/p>\n<p>For example, when your husband comes home late from work, you might demand an apology, threaten him, or blame him for being late again.\u00a0 But what would happen if you took the blame for your feelings instead of thinking he caused you to feel this way again?\u00a0 Believe it or not, the only person who allows or creates your feelings is you.\u00a0 You allow or create your feelings in how you respond to events in your life.\u00a0 So when something happens to which you would normally respond with anger, stop and think, &#8220;Am I helping this situation or making it worse?\u00a0 How can I help the situation?&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>The real problem in your life when he comes home late is not the fact that he came home late again.\u00a0 It is your anger.\u00a0 But if you commit to loving him unconditionally (even when he does things that annoy you), you would not communicate that negativity to him. \u00a0Giving up the need to be right has the same effect.\u00a0 The same can be said for setting healthy boundaries instead of trying to control the other person. And, when you do not communicate anger over a situation, you empower yourself to improve a relationship instead of making it a bigger challenge.<\/p>\n<p>If you take this fourth step, others will not walk over you.\u00a0 Others will RESPECT and LOVE you more, because you are lovingly guiding a relationship to a healthy place.<\/p>\n<p>My Grandma was very wise and her four steps to mending ANY relationship are valuable information.\u00a0 I will always be thankful that she imparted them to me.<\/p>\n<p>Use this fourth step to mend any relationship and have successful relationships.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<h4 style=\"text-align: center;\">Let the\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/dictionary.cambridge.org\/us\/dictionary\/english\/encouraging\" slimstat=\"5\">encouraging words<\/a>\u00a0in these\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/dictionary.cambridge.org\/us\/dictionary\/english\/river\" slimstat=\"5\">near\u00a0a\u00a0river<\/a>\u00a0posts help you<\/h4>\n<h4 style=\"text-align: center;\">soar like an\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/dictionary.cambridge.org\/us\/dictionary\/english\/eagle\" slimstat=\"5\">eagle<\/a>\u00a0above life\u2019s storms.<\/h4>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<h4 style=\"text-align: center;\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.bobbiejrae.com\/home\/respect-yourself-bj-rae-eagle-encouraging-words\/\">There are some relationships you should not try to keep!<\/a><\/h4>\n<h4 style=\"text-align: center;\">Remain uplifted in spite of your circumstances.<\/h4>\n<h4 style=\"text-align: center;\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.bobbiejrae.com\/nearariver\/?s=mend+any+relationship\">You can read all four posts in this series here.<\/a><\/h4>\n<h4 style=\"text-align: center;\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.bobbiejrae.com\/nearariver\/expectations-near-river-bj-rae-eagle\/\">What do you expect from life?<\/a><\/h4>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<h4 style=\"text-align: center;\">If you enjoyed this post, remember that BJ writes\u00a0<a href=\"http:\/\/www.dictionary.com\/browse\/children\" data-slimstat=\"5\">children\u2019s<\/a>\u00a0<a href=\"http:\/\/www.dictionary.com\/browse\/book\" data-slimstat=\"5\">books<\/a>.<\/h4>\n<h4 style=\"text-align: center;\">Her\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/dictionary.cambridge.org\/us\/dictionary\/english\/encouraging\" slimstat=\"5\">encouraging<\/a>\u00a0<a href=\"http:\/\/www.dictionary.com\/browse\/children\" data-slimstat=\"5\">children\u2019s<\/a>\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/dictionary.cambridge.org\/us\/dictionary\/english\/eagle\" slimstat=\"5\">eagle<\/a><\/h4>\n<h4 style=\"text-align: center;\"><u><a href=\"https:\/\/dictionary.cambridge.org\/us\/dictionary\/english\/river\" slimstat=\"5\">near\u00a0a\u00a0river<\/a><\/u>\u00a0<u><\/u>common core\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/www.collinsdictionary.com\/dictionary\/english\/reading-book\" data-slimstat=\"5\">reading book<\/a><\/h4>\n<h4 style=\"text-align: center;\">is available on\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/www.amazon.com\/\" slimstat=\"5\">Amazon.com<\/a>\u00a0and\u00a0Barnesandnoble.com.<\/h4>\n<h4 style=\"text-align: center;\">Buy BJ\u2019s\u00a0<u><a href=\"https:\/\/dictionary.cambridge.org\/us\/dictionary\/english\/river\" slimstat=\"5\">near\u00a0a\u00a0river<\/a><\/u>\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/dictionary.cambridge.org\/us\/dictionary\/english\/encouraging\" slimstat=\"5\">encouraging\u00a0<\/a><a href=\"https:\/\/dictionary.cambridge.org\/us\/dictionary\/english\/eagle\" slimstat=\"5\">eagle\u00a0<\/a><a href=\"https:\/\/www.collinsdictionary.com\/dictionary\/english\/reading-book\" data-slimstat=\"5\">reading book<\/a><\/h4>\n<h4 style=\"text-align: center;\">for a\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/dictionary.cambridge.org\/us\/dictionary\/english\/child\" slimstat=\"5\">child<\/a>\u00a0you care about today!<\/h4>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>What is the fourth step to mend ANY relationship? In the first three posts in this series, you read the first three steps to mending ANY relationship.\u00a0 First, you must commit to loving the person.\u00a0 Second, you must give up <a href=\"https:\/\/bobbiejrae.com\/nearariver\/fourth-step-near-river-bj-rae-eagle-encouraging-words\/\"> Read more&#8230;<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":5760,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[2,190,133],"tags":[1588,77,1271,1269,1328,1334,1270,1329,1337,1332,1321,12,1331,1330,1320,1273,1322,1302,1274,1323,1325,1326,1324,19,1275,1319,1318,716,1327,1336,1335,1268,1238,1333,297,1260,1299],"class_list":["post-5759","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-articles","category-parenting-positive-near-river","category-successful-bj-rae","tag-common-core-eagle-reading-book","tag-bj-rae","tag-books-for-children","tag-books-for-kids","tag-child-eagle-reading-book","tag-childrens-book","tag-childrens-books","tag-childrens-eagle-reading-book","tag-childrens-reading-book","tag-common-core-reading-book","tag-core-reading-book","tag-eagle","tag-eagle-book-for-child","tag-eagle-child-book","tag-eagle-children-book","tag-eagle-childrens-book","tag-eagle-core-reading-book","tag-eagle-kid-book","tag-eagle-kids-book","tag-eagle-reading-book","tag-eagle-reading-book-for-child","tag-eagle-reading-book-for-children","tag-eagle-reading-book-for-kids","tag-encouragement","tag-encouraging","tag-encouraging-childrens-book","tag-encouraging-kids-book","tag-encouraging-words","tag-kid-eagle-reading-book","tag-kid-reading-book","tag-kids-book","tag-kids-books","tag-mend-any-relationship","tag-reading-book","tag-soar-like-an-eagle","tag-take-responsibility-for-how-you-feel","tag-words-of-encouragement"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/bobbiejrae.com\/nearariver\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5759","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/bobbiejrae.com\/nearariver\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/bobbiejrae.com\/nearariver\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bobbiejrae.com\/nearariver\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bobbiejrae.com\/nearariver\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=5759"}],"version-history":[{"count":20,"href":"https:\/\/bobbiejrae.com\/nearariver\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5759\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":21245,"href":"https:\/\/bobbiejrae.com\/nearariver\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5759\/revisions\/21245"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bobbiejrae.com\/nearariver\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/5760"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/bobbiejrae.com\/nearariver\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=5759"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bobbiejrae.com\/nearariver\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=5759"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bobbiejrae.com\/nearariver\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=5759"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}